insomnia is a dish best served cold.

i often have trouble sleeping and find myself lying in bed, anxiously scratching my dry skin and day dreaming. last night my mind began to wonder what celebrities would be like had they not gone into the entertainment business. a few examples:

what if jay-z had decided his true passion was teaching grammar and composition to high school students? would he have been the director of the school's glee club?

what if tina fey had gone to law school and eventually earned the title "her honorable judge elizabeth fey"? would she still eat junk food and make poop jokes?

a darker one, what if a young, precocious ashton kutcher had gotten his hands on the unabomber's manifesto, industrial society and its future ? would he have ended up being the one to send the post 9/11 anthrax letters?

finally, what if brad pitt had finished his last semester and MU and graduated with a bachelors of journalism in advertising? where would he be now? he may have still found himself in los angeles, but it's doubtful he would be raising humanitarian efforts and children with angelina jolie. my guess is he'd be writing jingles and producing commercials for snapple and sketchers.